Another day, another Brian De Palma remake. Except this time it’s a re-remake. Yes, the general populace might not be aware of the fact but Scarface from 1983 was actually a remake of Howard Hawks1932 original. That one involved an Italian (the very not Italian, Paul Muni) taking over the Chicago booze trade while the De Palma version followed a Cuban (the very not Cuban, Al Pacino) taking over the Miami cocaine business.

Universal are keen for another go, with the updated version originally announced last year. Then David Ayer was tapped to write the script. Now, even though Ayer seems set to become a hot property with the success of cop drama End of Watch, Universal have brought in Donnie Brasco screenwriter, Paul Attanasio to re-write Ayers screenplay.

This raises several interesting questions: Where will the new Tony be from? What will his last name be? What city will it be set in? What illegal trade will he take over? And, most importantly, do we need this?

May we suggest Serbia (but played by an actor with Cuban heritage to continue the nonsensical casting choices),  Petrović (the most common Serbian surname, wouldn’t want to not be stereotypical now would we), San Francisco (switching up those coasts), stolen goods (human trafficking would probably be to bold, but it’ll end up being drugs again). And probably not. But does your, possibly, new found knowledge that Scarface was a remake affect your answer?

We’re of course open to suggestions.

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